Winner or Loser? [Post # 79]

So, which are you? Do you think like this? Is this what life is all about? Look at our culture, our world, history, psychology and religion and philosophy. I know, I know, this is how it goes in life. You are either a winner or a loser. Blah-blah-blah.

So easy to fall into this way of thinking if you listen to our world, our society and culture. So, did you make it in this life? If your field of employment was in acting and performing, did you become a movie star? If you were an attorney, in the practice of law and the justice system, did you make it to the Supreme Court? If in politics, the presidency or perhaps a governor or senator? If you’re a real winner, shouldn’t you have made it to the top in your field? Take a self-improvement course or get into a new age type of self-improvement cult and you’ll be told you can have it all, be anything you want, etc., etc.

Okay, there is some truth to this very optimistic and positive thinking way of life. Yes, indeed, some of us do make it “to the top,” but then there are the rest of us. How do we feel about our lives? Within ourselves, how do we feel about all of this, making it or not making it, being a real winner or a loser?

Our culture is built upon the whole competition theme. Everywhere. It seems everything is a competition. We have to beat others to be a success. Of course, in sports this is necessary as that’s what it is all about, competition and winning. I get that. But what I’m saying is that’s great in the world of sports but perhaps it is not always so good in other areas of life.

Got to do a little work in the Hollywood industry. This was a scene from a TV movie in the 1980’s. Does this make me a “winner? No, just a fun experience I had.

How many people have ended their lives by suicide because they felt they were a loser? They didn’t meet some standard they believed was a real measure of a person’s worth. They felt they were a failure. So sad. Such wrong thinking.

So, what about us, regular people, not trying to climb to the top of society? I feel we still are affected by this pressure to win, beat others, come out on top, put others down, etc. Like I said, there’s some merit and purpose to “competition” in life, but I think it is way overdone and can cause a lot of damage and ill will.

As I see it, we should only be concerned with our own personal path in this brief life. My path is my path. My path is not your path. I don’t need to meet some arbitrary standard society tells me is the way to go, the way to be a “success.”

So, this may not be a popular way of seeing things in our world. And that may be a problem that many people have. They therefore feel a bit miserable in life. That’s sad. I say be who you are, do what you want in life. I have and I am doing my life my way. I have done the things I have dreamed of doing. I have a great feeling of accomplishment and happiness and joy by following my path in the life given to me.

People don’t have to understand your life. You are the one who needs to understand your life. I believe you can be something like a janitor your whole life and have a good life if that is what you love and that is what gives you purpose and satisfaction and fulfillment. Not a popular way of thinking for most people, but I have known such people.

I must say that it helps to have a long life. When you have a long life, you have an opportunity to see how all the parts of life fit together. The puzzle finally makes sense if you “keep on the path.” When I look at the lives of friends who have not had the blessing of a long life, some left this world not having done what they wanted to do. They had unrealized dreams and suddenly had to depart this life.

So, I am thankful for all of my life. Especially thankful for a long life in order to understand it all. Not thrilled to have it all end but thrilled to have fulfilled my dreams and to have loved and been loved. This is what I wish for all. If this is your life, you are a “winner” as I see it. The societal standards of winning and losing are not a part of how I view life.

Wally