Month: October 2021

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Surprise! That’s Life! [ Post # 68 ]

Okay, I’m older. I’ve lived a while on this earth. I’ve lived in this, at times, well, always, come to think of it, crazy world. Yes, crazy, insane world, but also a great world, a paradise at times and in some ways. Contradictory viewpoints and analysis, you say? Well, yes.

And that’s the point of this post. Yes, there are optimists (extreme optimists), and there are pessimists (some extreme, also). Guess you could place me in the middle somewhere. Well, actually I’m an optimist, but a conditional optimist. I don’t deny the bad of this world. Looking to my teachers, mentors of life, Jesus and the Buddha and others, I see that they basically took the middle ground, also. Saw the bad, saw the good and the potential good in life and the world.

My major in college was history, so I studied history and I can say, there always were bad times and bad things going on in the world. Some horrible things, in all ages. You think today is bad? Study history; ain’t nothing new. Just in your face now, daily, with instant news broadcasts and social media and people all wound-up in cults and conspiracy theories and rigid belief systems. Anger, hate, hostility, insanity, etc.

Just yesterday I was in line for my booster vaccination and someone just walked right up in front of me and went to the check-in window and said he had a later appointment but wanted an earlier one due to he had to get to a funeral. Yeah, right. I looked at the people behind me in line and we all had similar expressions, like “what the hell?” The man didn’t even look at us, well, a quick glance , so he knew what he was doing. I thought, in the old days, I’d confront him, but I’ve seen too many nasty encounters these days in stores, so I decided to just let it go and see what happens. He ended getting his shot ahead of mine, then he lingered around the store. Didn’t look like he has is a rush to get to a funeral. An interesting observation. I could just tell he was probably one of those pushy, nasty people that we see a lot of these days. Like I said, an interesting observation of current human behavior in public.

So, on to my point of this blog. In my older years, I’ve come to some conclusions about life after decades of living and observing life. I’ve come to the conclusion that all of life is a “surprise.” ALL of life is a surprise! We don’t really know, from moment to moment, what is about to happen in our life. Oh, we think we do. We think every day will be the same. Same ole, same ole they say. And for much of the time that may be so. That’s how we get through our days. Habits and routines are counted on to provide meaning and purpose in life. Got it, that’s how we think of life. But really? I don’t think so.

You know, in the Bible is says that good things happen to good people, and bad things happen to bad people. Oh, yeah, and it also says good things happen to bad people and bad things happen go good people. The books of Proverbs and Job cover a lot of this territory as my deep study of theology and the scriptures reveals to me. Interesting. So good and bad happens to all of us.

Every moment is SURPRISE! This incident, in my face right now, is now what’s happening. You get a phone call that a friend or family member has suddenly died. Your routine casual car trip suddenly becomes an accident and you are badly injured or worse. Or, you win the lottery and are financially set for life. Or, whatever. We never know (for sure) what the next moment will bring. Life is surprise, moment by moment, day by day. No way around this fact. Oh, you say, “I’ve got religion, I’ve got faith, I’ve got hope!” And I would agree. I would absolutely agree and say the same exact words. I have great faith. It sustains me, absolutely. But what I’m saying is that even with all the faith and hope and and positivity, life is a moment-to- moment experience of “surprise.”

So, from the moment we are born, life REALLY is surprise. Surprise moment after surprise moment. Some infants live only moments, others go on to live over a hundred years. And for those that survive the birth process and childhood, every day, every moment is “surprise,” a new moment in the unknown realm of “what’s next?” And the human response to all of the surprises we experience, especially the bad or unhappy surprises is, usually, if we are honest, “why?, how? Where are you, God?, can there even be a God?”

And that’s the way it is. That’s my observation, my take on it all. We never know exactly what’s coming. Gosh, wish we did. We live like we did. We can’t prepare for everything that could occur. Impossible. What we can prepare for is that every moment of our lives is part of an unfolding of our destiny. A destiny we often do not understand (“why, God?”).

I find it helps to have faith. To have connection, both to people (our community) and to the unseen side of life. To the life force, the Presence, the Divine, God, Higher self. We can’t control it all (life). We play our part. We do our best (hopefully). To those of a religious bent, we do God’s will. Whichever category we fit into, we live our lives, but every moment is a “surprise!” We have to live with that fact, that knowledge.

Wally

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I’m Not Normal, and That’s Okay [ Post #67 ]

(There has been a gap between my last blog and this one due to my brother’s passing. Losing someone close in the family disrupts life, so I have put aside completing this blog for a bit but now have resumed writing. Perhaps in a future blog I will reflect on my sibling and all that is involved in sibling relationships. We’ll see.)

Are you normal? I’m sure a lot of people think they are. And that’s good. But I know some people that don’t think they are “normal” and I would include myself in that group of people. I’ve always felt like an “outsider,” I guess. In earlier blogs I described what my childhood and growing up was like. Some struggles and rough and dark times. That’s probably very normal in the whole scheme of things. I have had some “dark times” beyond the usual childhood experiences, times I will not discuss at this time. But beyond all of that, I’ve never felt that I “fit in.”

I was advised there are certain ways to live and certain things to do to be a normal, all-American young man. Of course I tried to adhere to the advice given. I accepted what my elders told me at that young age. Some things worked out, some did not. Some made sense, of course, and some did not, in my mind. I feel that my father had great dreams of me being a great athlete. I did get the message and I really did try to fulfill his wishes. I played Little League baseball for a short while but I was not that great. I was never that good at other sports, either. But I tried. I did like activities like archery and I really got into golf in my youth. My parents belonged to a local country club and I did a lot of golfing for a while. I enjoyed it. But then, one day a relative told me that it was very important to be a good golfer in life, especially in the life of a young man, That was imperative if one was going to be a successful person in life. At that point, I began to lose my interest in golf as it was explained to me that it was a status thing, something any business person must do and be skillful at. I guess, for me, that was a turnoff. Killed my interest.

In a lot of other things, I never really “fit in.” I see myself now as being a “sampler” of life. I “sampled” this and that. I dabbled in this and that. I, of course, had the All-American dream of being a family man with a perfect family , with all the trappings. In my twenties I realized that was not to be, that was not me. Great for others, but not my “thing.” So, then I had to decide what was I going to be? After much thinking and confusion and tasting of this and that in life, I realized I could still have an amazing life, a fulfilling life, a life of relationships and love and complete happiness. There was nothing, really, to prevent that from being my life experience. So, onward I went and did find a good life. Sure, I may have never “fit in” to the program that was laid out for me, but I survived and actually thrived.

I was a pilot and none of my friends were pilots or had the deep interest in aviation that I had. But that did not stop me from pursuing my dreams in that field. Even when I was very active in that field, I never felt very close to those pilots I did become friends with. I did not share the whole “macho” culture they all seemed to relish.

I was involved in the church a lot, but, also there I also feel I did not really “fit in.” I went to seminary, I studied a lot of church history and theology but could not really feel a part of the whole church culture. I feel that I was probably too much of an independent thinker to just go along with the crowd in religious thinking. I found a lot of messy church situations to be the norm rather than the exception. So, even though I became an occasional preacher of sorts, again, I never felt that I really fit in.

So, now I’m retired, in that later stage of life where some of us do a lot of “life review” contemplation. I see that perhaps I was not “normal.” I did not do the things my society and culture “programmed” me for. I did not fit the dreams my parents may have had for me, well, especially my father. Too bad. I lived my life as it unfolded and I feel I did a good job of living the life that I wanted. The life that I feel was laid out as mine to live.

Some of us do great things in life. Some of us become very successful and famous. Others live a more quiet life, unknown to the rest of the world. What really matters? How do we feel when we come to that last breath that we take on this earthly plane? I think the best way to conclude life is to be happy. Feel satisfied. Feel fulfilled. Having loved totally. To be one with all of life, and if you have any faith, belief, spiritual perception, to be totally with God.

Wally